KETAN JOSHI
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Dubai Expo 2020

The amazing Dubai expo - now we are at the fag end of the trip and I wanted to drop into Dubai to see the great version of the World’s Fair - now called the Dubai Expo!
‘Arre why are you traipsing around Dubai?!!’ SWMBO shouted. ‘Why risk covid? You should stay inside your room, cover yourself in shrouds like a mummy and soak yourself in vinegar and antiseptic’
‘Tchah!’ I replied ‘bah! Gah! Parikshit could not protect himself from sarpayog by staying inside a tower and neither can you protect yourself from covid by cowering inside a room!’
And she was so bowled over by my classical knowledge of Indian mythology that she didn’t have a leg to stand on! So she gnashed her teeth and agreed to book me through Dubai and my old friend Yogesh Ghugari invited me to stay with him - once I was proven Covid free!


‘But I have already cleared the PCR test.’ I said
‘Er…yeah…just stay in a hotel for one night and if you are still alive in the morning, then come over to my place.’
‘WHAT?’
‘I said - just stay in a hotel for one night and then come over to my place.’
‘But…I thought you said…never mind…I will see you tomorrow.’


Bharathi had booked a hotel for me for the night, and I was indeed alive the next morning - a fact which I duly reported to Yogesh.
‘Ah good!’ he said ‘Come on over, then.’
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Yogesh gave me a metro card and I went to the metro and took a train to Expo!


I had one free ticket to the Expo - because I had flown by Emirates on my outward leg to Spain. Obviously I knew nothing about it - it was SWMBO who knew about it and had sent me the mail with the QR code.


What an experience that expo is! Mind blowing ! 198 countries have put up their stalls - and without any commercial motive to sell you anything!  Amazing!
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I went to the UAE, Saudi Arabia, Kazakhstan, USA and India stalls and also stalls by the Dubai port world, Dubai energy company etc which were excellent! The Saudi pavilion was amazing, The Russian pavilion was magnificent! The US one was also nice. But the UK one was absolutely foul. It was a disgrace. Limeys suck.
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When I saw the ‘India’ pavilion, I was very excited! It was the first sight of home in 2 months.
But alas, the India pavilion seemed to be more about Prime Minister Modi than about India. Photos of Modi, videos of Modi, a rather hilarious animated ‘avatar’ of a ripped Modi doing yogasanas, a booth to take a picture of yourself with a simulated Modi…
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It was not all bad certainly - there was a level called ‘charismatic India’ which was amazing - a giant room covered with video walls with some awesome videos of India - stunning locales, traditional dances, Indian movies, etc !
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Two days was far too less to do justice to the Expo - one would have to spend at least a week to see the whole thing in a relaxed manner and eat all the food and drink all the beer.  I couldn’t even stay late, as poor Yogesh was waiting for me and hungering and slavering for my company! He must have been standing at the window with his nose pressed against the glass and muttering ‘He cometh not! He cometh not!’

So the days went in seeing as many exhibits as I could and the evenings went in meeting friends for dinner and drinks.
What an awesome way to end the trip.

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SWMBO had booked my return ticket and I grimaced as I saw that the return was from Sharjah instead of Dubai. The flight was at 8 pm so I left the expo at 2 pm sharp and came back to Yogesh’s place by 3.30. He had got some awesome biryani for me and I feasted on chicken and mutton biryani and then he called a cab and I left for Sharjah.
Just as I was leaving, I pinged Bharathi.
As it was early, there was no traffic and I reached Sharjah within half an hour and showed my PCR result to the guard and walked in and stood in the checkin line. While in the line I connected to Wi-Fi - and there was a message from SWMBO
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN SHARJAH?YOUR FLIGHT IS FROM DUBAI AT 22.45!!
Eh? What?
I was shocked - I checked the ticket - and it was from Sharjah! I replied - ‘But I am seeing the ticket! It’s an Indigo flight from Sharjah!’
NO NO NO NO ! I CANCELLED THAT TICKET! BOOKED A NEW ONE FROM DUBAI!
What?!
Same airline - Same date - but different flight? Why ?
(Complicated reason… TLDR)
But but…
JUST GET IN A TAXI AND GO TO DXB!


Ah dammit. I went out of the gate but there was a barrier between departure and arrival terminals. So I went back inside and explained the matter to the guard - I am at the wrong airport! I need to go to Dubai!
The guard rolled his eyes at the stupidity and let me through to Arrivals where I got into a cab.
‘Dubai airport!’ I said
‘Airport?’ The taxi guy said ‘But you just got here!’
‘Oh just drive!’
‘Which terminal ?’
I checked the ticket and answered ‘Terminal 1’
‘Are you sure?’
‘Sure? Of course I am sure! Why do you ask?’
‘Oh…er…nothing nothing… terminal 1 it is…’
I reached Dubai airport and since I had plenty of time- sat in a Costa Coffee and ordered a coffee and filled up the ‘Air Suvidha’ form - a stupid and pointless  online form that one has to fill out before you can be allowed boarding into any flight going to India.


As I stood in the line again, the document checker came and I showed him my ticket on the phone.
‘Show me Air suvidha!’ He demanded
‘All in good time bro’ I said ‘first see the ticket.’
Then I opened my mail and showed him the Air Suvidha form.
‘PCR ?’
I showed him the soft copy on the phone
‘OK’ he said and put a green sticker on my passport.
The line kept moving and soon I was summoned by the checkin agent. I gave her my passport and then opened my mail to see the ticket
‘Are you sure ?’ The message was flashing on my phone .. and without thinking much, I pressed ‘Yes’
Ok - your mail has been permanently deleted !
What?
What?
Shit!
I HAD JUST DELETED MY TICKET! Right in front of the check in counter!
Oh! Shit!


But the Patron saint of Idiots was with me again!
She didn’t need to see the ticket - apparently my passport number was enough for her! Thank God!


She wanted to see my Air Suvidha and PCR again - and luckily those had not got deleted


I got my boarding pass! WOOHOO!


Now to celebrate with a beer!
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I cleared immigration and bought some duty free booze and collected my bags and caught a taxi.


And I was home!


The trip was over!


The long long trip -
60 days,
2 hemisphere,
5 continent,
5 country -
trip was over!


‘YOU ARE BACK! YIPPEE!’ Bharathi said and hugged me and kissed me.


’Thank you! Thank you!’ I said ‘I am indeed glad to be ba…’


I only got so far before she interrupted me!


’NOW GET READY TO GO TO THE ARCTIC!’


‘Eh? What?’
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HOME FOOD AFTER 60 DAYS! IDLIS COATED WITH GUNPOWDER CHUTNEY POWDER! WOOHOO! 
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get the book on amazon
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